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goodrTIMES

How do you have a very goodr Halloween? The answer is sunglasses. It’s the easiest accoutrement to any Halloween costume, especially if your party has been moved to the virtual space. Not only will shielding your eyes cause you to look 87% more like what you’re trying to dress up as, but nobody will be able to tell if you’re engaged with the videochat or adding the deluxe Hershey 75-piece candy assortment to your Amazon cart. It’s a win.

If you’re like, “F Halloween, it’s cancelled!” It’s not! But we hear you… we live for pillow cases full of candy as well. Instead, trick-or-treat with goodr for $6.66 off your purchase. We’re not asking you to hail Satan, we’re just trying to give you a beast of a deal. All you need to do is figure out what Carl the Flamingo and his three fellow flockstars are going to dress up as for Halloween. The clues are in this costume guide…

*** OH NO! "You snooze you lose," says Carl. This little promo ended on 12/31/2020. But feel free to still try to solve the riddle and get some costume inspo for whatever weird party you have planned next. ***

Rules we play by:

1. The one-word answer must be submitted at point of purchase in all caps. If your answer is correct, you save $6.66. If not… try again or burn. For example: RUMPELSTILTSKIN

2. You must agree to NOT bother our Customer Service Parrots. They won’t be bribed with Milk Duds. Anyone that can be bribed with Milk Duds needs to step it up a notch. Maybe Reese’s... We promise there is an answer, and believe it or not, it is right before your eyes…

HALLOWEEN COSTUME GUIDE

If you’re stumped on what to dress up as this year, you’re not alone. You’ve done every public service job with the word “sexy” in front of it. Sexy police officer, sexy firefighter, sexy garbage collector (that was a weird year…), it’s time for a fresh costume. We hope these ideas inspire you.

1. AN OVERHEATED DEVIL

Do you feel a hole in your soul? Sweat excessively? An overheated devil is the costume for you because it’s always a haute day in hell. Luckily these too hawt to handle fiery red cateye sunglasses are exactly what you need to complete the look.

2. BAKERS ON A MISSION

Is your freezer full of failed attempts at making sourdough bread during quarantine? It’s a miracle that yeast hasn’t come to life to haunt your nightmares (yet). Whether you have a bun in the oven, or a bun on the top of your head, be a baker for Halloween with these buttery yellow round sunglasses. A minimal effort costume that gives you a chance to actually show off that one successful loaf. Your friends will be screaming, “Gimme, gimme, gimme more bread!”

3. BIGFOOT TRYING TO BLEND IN

The name of the game is to blend in. You’re a mystical mythical beast for Pete’s sake! Halloween is not the time to get discovered, and you know those monster hunters never take a break, not even on Halloween. That’s why these dark gray wide frame sunglasses, appropriately named Bigfoot’s Fernet Sweats are exactly what you need to cover that hairy face of yours. Pair with shorts and a t-shirt and act casual.

4. THE TIGER THAT ATE CAROLE BASKIN'S HUSBAND

Mamma mia! Was that millionaire meat? Whatever it was, you ate it all. Don't get down on yourself, you're an animal, you didn't know better. Stuff your face with no regrets this Halloween as one of Carole Baskin's prized big cat rescues. Pair your costume with these vibrant orange sunglasses with a sleek blue mirrored lens, guaranteed to hide your tiger tears from the bellyache your future holds.

5. A PIECE OF PIE

You know your key lime pie is the best in the county. It’s so delectable you should probably dress up as a piece of it for Halloween. Paired with Total Lime Piece neon green cateye shades, you’ll surely not only win best dessert, but also best costume. And remember, the winner takes it all.

6. BIKER GANG

Looking for a couples costume? There is nothing like #twinning pleather pants and jackets. Take it to the next level by hopping on your low-rider and smashing pedals through the neighborhood. Get caught rolling a stop sign though and a super trouper will be on you like dog hair in velcro. goodr’s collection of Super Fly retro sunglasses are the perfect accessory for this badass costume.
We hope we inspired you to cobble together some kind of costume this Halloween. It really doesn’t take that much effort to look fabulous. Just the right combination of digging through your closet and purchasing a pair of perfectly coordinating goodr sunglasses and you’ll surely be the fan fave. If you’re Swedish, feel free to exploit their bizarro tax deductible law-- if you can prove your clothes aren’t for daily wear, they’re tax deductible. We’re not sure if that’s still in effect, but if it is, shit... Swedish Halloween must be off the chain. Heck, that’s how we were able to afford the costume for our Swedish Meatball Hangover photoshoot…
Oh, were you able to figure out what Carl and his flamigos are dressing up as for Halloween this year??! There are twelve clues in this blog, sooo if you didn’t get it… maybe you don’t deserve it. Hopefully that candy you put in your Amazon cart is available for Prime shipping because we have a feeling you’ll be drowning your sorrows in it, home alone grooving to Dancing Queen, if you fail to unlock this spooktacular deal.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN MOTHER FLOCKERS!

P.S. Check back on this costume guide on All Hallows’ Eve, that’s another name for Halloween, aka 10/31, and we’ll give you the answer. Be prepared to shop quick, because this promo gets ghost-busted on 10/31 at midnight Pacific Time.

P.P.S. Alright, we're ready to tell you the answer, heck-- you can even tell your friends the answer! What can we say? We're really bad at keeping secrets... THE ANSWER IS: ABBA

But you knew that already didn't you? All the song references and random banter about Swedish shit.

GIMME MORE TO READ!

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