Shopping Bag
Round hipster glasses for the low price of 2.7 overpriced coffees. So many humans have their morning routines. They wake up and go to the same spot to get coffee, or fuel up their vehicle, or pick up some morning...
Being an influencer is hard work. You have to like, get up in the morning, share, go pee, share, drink some meal shake that's kind of okay and has questionable health benefits, share that. Then you probably commute on something...
Veronica was a fashion editor that always knew what was hot without even trying. And, in fact, made things hot by choosing them for her publication. She was once played by Meryl Streep in the little known film The Devil...
It’s obvious that the flamingo would be the best at pistols in all of the animal kingdom. The flamingos around the world take so much pride in their pistoling ability that they hold The Flamingo CrossFit Games annually every August...
Back in the late 1950s, goodr co-founder and weirdo, Stephen Lease, had a sordid but gentle love affair with a bright purple kraken named Maven. He would spend days on end staring into her purple & teal eyes while tending to...
Excerpt from George Miller’s Diary, December 17, 1992 This Outback Outhouse was exactly as you would expect it to be, the stench of urinal cakes and meat pie blow outs permeated the air for miles around; but at mile 43...
Back in the summer of ’71, the Board of Directors of goodr met in the Cancun office, which was located on one of the many pristine beaches in the area. Halfway through the morning board meeting, we ran out of...
EXCERPT FROM THE NEVERENDING STORY SCREENPLAY ALTERNATE ENDING: INT. ATTIC – DAY Bastian flops down on his back and sighs, a little pissed that The Neverending Story had hooked him, even though it is just a creepier knock-off of Lord-of-the-Rings-meets-Princess-Bride, and obviously not good at...
A foolhardy adventure? Maybe. A needlessly dangerous excursion? Possibly. The fever dream of a New York City office bro? Probably? The last chance for a set of hopeless romantics to prove their self-worth in a most irrational way? Most assuredly. It...
The night Mick Jagger and Keith Richards wrote Midnight Rambler, the legendary duo not only managed to write one of the most classic rock and roll songs in their extensive repetoire but they also had one hell of an epic...
CARL THE FLAMINGO RECENTLY OVERHEARD THIS CONVERSATION WHILE DRINKING A MUSHROOM FOAM LATTE AT URTH BOUND CAFE IN WEST HOLLYWOOD… “Wait, who’s Dawn of a New Sage again?!” “Isn’t that the flake who sells her candida cleanse tea for $15...
CARL THE FLAMINGO AND FRIENDS EULOGIZE TEDDY THE TURKEY After looking up to drink delicious rainwater and forgetting to look down, occasional goodr sunglasses model Teddy the Turkey accidentally drowned. To make the situation even more tragic, he had just...
