DENVER ZOO AND GOODR BECOME BEST FRIENDS FOREVER (OR AT LEAST UNTIL THEIR CONTRACT EXPIRES)
Move over, Kanye and Kim! There’s a new American power couple: Denver Zoo and goodr. It’s the perfect alliance. One is a sanctuary for wild animals to live and breed in a secure environment, and the other is Denver Zoo. HA. We’ll be here all night.
The fruit of the collaboration? Party Like a Flockstar, which is a pair of sunglasses, not an actual fruit, so don’t take a bite out of it or put it in your smoothie blender. With feathered pink translucent frames and black polarized lenses, these shades will give you so much big flamingo energy you’ll sleep standing up -- and like it.
Proceeds go to Denver Zoo, which houses 77 flamingos, aka “flockstars.” Seriously, they’re named after rock stars like Freddie Mercury, Slash, and Lance Bass. (And don’t @ us, we believe Freddie Mercury and Slash can rock out JUST as much as Lance Bass.) In fact, the Freddie and Lance birds used to be a couple! (That’s right, used to be. The zoo says they are no longer a couple. And now goodr employees no longer believe in love.)
All ornithologists agree: Flamingos are the rock stars of birds. They’re flamboyant, attitude driven, hopelessly addicted to brine, did their best work in their 20’s, congregate in mudflats and lagoons, and command a massive audience: Denver Zoo sees roughly 2.2 million visitors a year and approximately 1.2 million of them visit the flamingos.
In celebration of the collab, goodr CEO Carl the Flamingo said, “These shades make you feel like you’re wearing a flamingo on your face. Which is pretty weird for me, since I’m a flamingo. Like if you wore human-themed shades. It’s unsettling. But they look great on humans! If you’re human, buy them. Then you can mimic our [BURRRRP] brilliance.”
(Denver Zoo depends on donations to keep the grounds open. Throw money at them here. We support all wildlife conservation centers not run by Tiger Kings.)