It’s not a bogey, it’s a flamingo.
First off, there is no such thing as a bogey. That term was made up by a bunch of golf jabronies in the 1890s, so we’re a bunch of jabronies ready to stake our claim in the golf lingo. It’s our very own flamingo-lingo, and if you don’t like it, too bad. Think about it, the golf scoring system goes: condor, albatross, eagle, birdie… in other words: Bird… Bird… Bird… Bird-ie... BOGEY?!! How does that make any sense? A flamingo is an actual bird, and it is a hell of a lot more fun to say. Say it with us, FLA-MIN-GO.
Additionally, “bogey” is just a stupid word. Nothing good starts with the letters b-o-g. For example, bog: “wet muddy ground too soft to support a heavy body.” Disgusting. Bogus: “not genuine or true; fake.” Nobody likes that. Bogeyman: “an imaginary evil spirit or being used to frighten children.” Reprehensible. If you use the word bogey, you support traumatizing children.
Of course, the “It’s not a bogey, it’s a flamingo” campaign has not been easy. People resist change. We try to persuade them with logic that bogeys are flamingos and flamingos are good but it doesn’t work. They fear the unknown. They’re emotionally connected to the old way of doing things. They worry they won’t make the transition, that they’ll blurt “bogey” instead of “flamingo” on the course and everyone will laugh at them. Thus, the repulsive word “bogey” persists. You can be the catalyst of change! You’ve got this.
Just look at this scorecard! How great do those flamingos look!
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