I Do My Own Stunts
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YOU FALL OUT OF BED. YOU TRIP DOWN THE STAIRS. YOU PICK UP A TRAY FULL OF DRINKS AND WALK INTO THE PATIO DOOR. YOU STEP ON A RAKE. YOU RIDE YOUR BIKE INTO A MAILBOX. YOU LEAN BACK IN YOUR CHAIR, FALL, AND BONK YOUR HEAD ON A FISH TANK. THE GLASS BREAKS. AQUARIUM WATER AND FLOPPING FISH RAIN DOWN ON YOU. EMBARRASSING MOMENTS? NAH. JUST PUT ON YOUR WRAP Gs AND ACT LIKE IT'S INTENTIONAL AS YOU SAUCILY QUIP, "I DO MY OWN STUNTS."
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